Allah allah kar kay Ammi ka phone aya. Jaan na nikal gayee ho jaisay. Salaam kia… phir boleen, khat mila tha. Parh liya hay. Kehnay lageen… dekh faisla tera hay aur mainay aaj tak kabhi tujhay zabardasti nahi ki.. Yahan baith kar may nahi janti woh kaisay log hain woh kaisi larki hay… lekin tu jo kehta hay sach hi ho ga. Tu meri us say ek baar baat to kara day… May nay kaha… Aur Abu kia kehtay hain.. Kehnay lageen.. Abu ka tujhay pata hay… maan jayengay.. He needs time. May nay kaha meri abu say baat karain.. Boleen… nahi abhi nahi kuch dinon baad phone karna. Phir bhaiyon ka poocha, poocha khana time say khatay ho.. Phir kaha Emergency aa gayee hay… ja rahi hoon.. Salam keh kar phone rakh diya.
My heart was perplexed. Ammi was not in a happy mood like she normally is. There was too much explanation on her part and that was making me uneasy. I had to speak to Abu. Abu speaks less so it stresses me more. After a couple of day, I called and spoke to Abu. As usual Abu started of by talking about school and courses and how my performance was and asked when am I expected to graduate. After all the usual questions, he said that your mother spoke to me about this girl. Then he said, Tum kitnay serious ho is larki kay baaray may. I said… Abu aap kia sochtay hain. Kehnay lagay,.. Yeh shadi koi 4,5 maheenay ki commitment to hay nahi, poori zindagi ki commitment hay. Abhi tumhain sab theek lag raha ho ga lekin jab mushkil din aatay hain tab pata chalta hay kay faisala sahi tha ya nahi per meri batain tumhari samajh may abhi nahi aa rahi hongi. Kehnay lagay, mujhay aiteraz nahi hay lekin agar tum pakistan may shadi karo to mujhay ziyada khushi ho gi. May chup ho gaya. Phir kuch dayr baat kar kay salaam kia aur phone rakh diya.
Bahut dayr sochta raha… Abu kay alfaz dimagh may ghoomtay rahay… lekin dimagh bar bar ek baghi soch kay tehat yahi kehta nahi yar nasir, you can pull this off. May Abu is wrong. Just this time, he might be actually wrong. My mind went into calculation recalculation mode as to how it will play out in my life. I knew she was not from my country, I knew she was not from my culture, She didnt speak my language, I knew there was a language barrier between us as her English was not that great and I knew she was far away and I was about to risk everything although I didnt know her face to face. I said to myself…. Are you stupid or are you crazy? How does it even compute. My mind was telling me all this and my heart was telling me just one thing. She is a muslim and shouldnt that is the only that should matter. The connection between me and her is not the language or culture but the kalimah that we both profess and believe in. The bond between us the loyalty that we have for Prophet Mohammad SAW, so why am I even thinking…. Isnt this enough? I think i made up my choice right there.
I chatted with Kulthum that day and told her that Ammi called and she was not mad but she wanted to talk to her. I gave Ammis number to her and she said that she was going to call her when it was morning in Pakistan. At the back of my head I was hoping.. Ya Allah Abu ka dil narm kar day. It was time of Fajr I still remember and I think those were the longest sujood ever in my salaat. I really did open my heart to Allah to help me. I didnt want to make a choice whereby my parents were not happy with me. I would not be accomplishing anything in my life if it was not for my parents. Their happiness was very important for me. But this torn up feeling was not something that I expected. Only Allah could help me sew my heart at that time. Now it was a waiting game and see what happens after Ammi speaks to Kulthum.
